Librarians Confess Their Naughtiest On-the-Job Moments

Vampire smut and 50 Shades between the covers.

You know the image: hair in a bun, cats-eye glasses, mouth pursed from frequent shushing. Librarians are in a stereotyped occupation. But besides being experts in finding the information you need -- or reprimanding you for the book you've had checked out since 2003 -- they are people with the same foibles and weaknesses as the rest of us. Only, expressed in a literally literary way.

The institutional wall of silence around the secret lives and practices of librarians has cracked, thanks to a blog called Librarian Shaming. In it, anonymous libraries unburden themselves of their secrets -- sometimes steamy, sometimes shoddy (at least for librarians) -- largely in pictures of them holding signs of their confessions in front of their faces.

Racy and sensual
The picture at the top shows the wilder side of librarians. It's one of a number supposedly from a town called Dracut, Massachusetts. (It's hard to stay anonymous with an unusual town name and a blog claiming to be yours that shows the same photos.

Not all claim to live the 50 Shades of Grey title, although at least one other Dracut librarian wouldn't mind the book if it were better written.



Another prefers steamy romances involving the undead.



Ah, for the days of the Tropic of Cancer and Lolita.

Literary anti-snobs
You might assume that all librarians leave work to curl up with some weighty tome. Not so! One librarian turns to DVDs rather than paper.





Some have overdosed entirely on books.



Others never seemed much enthralled with them even in the past.



Thieves
Then there are the library thieves: cunning plotters who, at one time or another have broken the trust of a library and made off with a book, whether for a long, unread, period of time or permanently.







At such a young age. Oh, the shame, the shame!

Reprobates
You also have the daring and lawless who flout not only library rules but federal law. There are those who conspire to infringe copyright,



the seemingly many who librarian-handle innocent books,



and those who write in books.



Grand conspiracy
Interestingly, the Dracut librarians were the first posters and left the following message:


We all have our dirty, embarrassing secrets. Dracut Librarians are no exception. Here are a few of our dirty librarian secrets. The faces have been hidden to protect their professional reputations <sic>


Obviously the ring leaders. Someone tell Homeland Security, only remind them to be very, very quiet.

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CalamityBabs

I loved it when Betty White was on last year's episode of "The Middle" and gave Brick the evil eye when he had tons of books not brought back to his school library....

October 11 2013 at 9:16 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Kulween Singh

Are they that innocent ? Come on .

October 11 2013 at 2:49 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
Chuck

"You know the image: hair in a bun, cats-eye glasses, mouth pursed from frequent shushing. Librarians are in a stereotyped occupation."

Yes I do know the steroetype and 99.9% of us don't fit it. So knock off the stereotyping please.

October 11 2013 at 2:47 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to Chuck's comment
mennis0852

Never seen a librarian that fit the stereotype, unless she wanted to.

October 11 2013 at 3:13 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
knarf714

I read them all, I diedn't see a single "dirty" secret. they were cute but hardly dirty. Probably little different from the general population. Except more of them actaully know how to read.

October 11 2013 at 12:15 PM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
arenadood

Watch the original movie, The Music Man and tell me that Shirley Jones id not a Hot Librarian.

October 11 2013 at 10:36 AM Report abuse +2 rate up rate down Reply
rhodesa

adding insightful commentary in margins would be good, however if it is like everything else in a country gone wild, it would only give a platform for crap talk, grafitti, and dumbing down type stuff... that is assuming those types use libraries

October 11 2013 at 9:14 AM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to rhodesa's comment
chris44107

I despise marginalia - I find it intrusive. If I want someone's commentary, I'll join a book club. What really drives me nuts is when someone corrects grammar or spelling.

October 11 2013 at 9:46 AM Report abuse +2 rate up rate down Reply
Elroy Jetson

"Someone tell Homeland Security" ...I'm sure the NSA are already tracking them.

October 11 2013 at 8:44 AM Report abuse +2 rate up rate down Reply
dollarhg

Librarians are lovely to be with!

October 11 2013 at 8:23 AM Report abuse +2 rate up rate down Reply
wes

Librarians can be some of the sexest women alive. The quet and shy type but isn't affraid try do certain things. everyone must be able to nail one your life will forever change.

October 11 2013 at 8:04 AM Report abuse +3 rate up rate down Reply
drakkusshadows

So when you think your job sux, remember these losers. I'm surprised they still have jobs. Who even goes to a library? Hello, that's what the internet is for.

October 11 2013 at 7:57 AM Report abuse -4 rate up rate down Reply
3 replies to drakkusshadows's comment

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