Forgotten Someone's Name? 6 Ways To Fake It
If you're like me, you sometimes have trouble remembering people's names, or even how you know them.
In ancient Rome, the job of the "nomenclator" was to whisper or announce the names of people as they approached a politician. My husband serves this function for me; he has an uncanny ability to recall names and faces--people he has met once, years ago, and also famous people. I really suffer when I got to social events without him.
So I've developed some strategies for coping with the fact that I'm not able to pull up a person's name. Of course, you can always just say politely, "I'm sorry, I don't recall your name," but if you'd rather try to disguise your forgetfulness a bit, give these a try:
1. The "I know your name, but I'm blocked" dodge:
"I keep wanting to call you "David," but I know that's not right."
2. The "Of course I know you--in fact, I want all your information" dodge:
"Hey, I'd love to get your card."
3. The "The tip of my tongue" dodge:
"I know I know your name, but I'm blanking right now."
4. The "You're brilliant!" dodge:
"Wow, you have a terrific memory. I can't believe you remember my name from that meeting six months ago. I can't remember the names of people I met yesterday! So of course I have to ask you your name."
5. The "Sure, I remember you" dodge:
"Remind me--what's your last name?" If you ask a person for his last name, he's likely to repeat both names. "Doe, John Doe."
6. The "One-sided introduction" dodge:
"Hey," you say to the person whose name you can't remember, "let me introduce you to Pat Smith." You introduce the two and say the name of the person whose name you remember. Almost always, the nameless person will volunteer his or her name.
Also, remember that others might have trouble remembering your name. When you're saying hello to someone, err on the side of re-introducing yourself. "Hi, John, it's Gretchen Rubin." Say your name slowly and clearly. And don't get offended if someone doesn't remember your name! And while you're at it, remember to smile. It really does make a difference in how friendly you're perceived to be.
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Gretchen Rubin is the author of several books, including the blockbuster New York Times bestsellers, Happier at Home and The Happiness Project--accounts of her experiences test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific studies, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happier. On her popular blog, The Happiness Project, www.happiness-project.com, she reports on her daily adventures in pursuit of happiness.more...