Most of us have been forced to play some sort of ice-breaker game, whether it's to find out five facts about the person sitting next to you or get into a group and work on a puzzle together. Teachers, managers and other group leaders often look for activities to make people in the room mingle with each other and hopefully bond. The goal is admirable. After all, making friends with the people around you can make your school days or workdays much easier.
"It's all about the point of the activity," says Ed Muzio, author of "Make Work Great." "Good activities engage people in active learning. Bad activities keep people busy."
A bad team-building activity is a waste of time, because it doesn't help you achieve anything.
"Terrible team-building sessions leave people in their chairs. Bad team-building sessions get people out of their chairs just to keep them awake. Good team-building sessions get people out of their chairs to learn something they couldn't have learned sitting down," Muzio says.
With that in mind, these workers share the worst team-building experiences of their careers:
Not-Bonding In Nature
"One of my clients, a research analyst, and the other members of his team were invited by their boss, the portfolio manager, for a half day team-building exercise. Their boss lived in a rural suburban community not far from a state park with hiking trails and a conference center. The members of the team all commuted together on this rainy morning and all expressed dissatisfaction in having to accommodate their boss's interests (he was an avid hiker), the inconvenience of the reverse commute, the weather and the fact that none of them had the right gear for hiking. Adding insult to injury, he picked them up at the train station in his large brand new high-end BMW.
"The team-building exercise began with a seven-mile hike and everyone -- except their boss, who was dressed head-to-toe in Gortex -- got soaked from the downpour. By the time they returned to the conference center, they were chilled and uncomfortable. Not a good mood to begin this sort of bonding exercise. As a postscript, two of the team members got poison ivy. An alternative: Their boss should have surveyed the team members, and based upon their feedback, he should have offered several options for events and locations rather than insisting that his team join him in the country." -- Roy Cohen, author of "The Wall Street Professional's Survival Guide"
"I was asked to help a nonprofit during their team-building day. The morning was a typical 'ropes' course at a local college. The staff were a very unhappy lot, and they showed it by showing up for the day without their 'game face on.' About half the women showed up in high heels, short skirts and elaborate hairdos so they couldn't participate. The day was a disaster, and by the time the games were over and our 'working' session was to start, they were in foul moods. It was an extreme example of how team-building events are mistaken for the long, hard work of actually building a team with shared goals and responsibilities." -- Rebecca Staton-Reinstein, president of Advantage Leadership Inc.
Avoiding The Issues
"My worst experience was at a job where the leadership was seriously lacking, [and] consultants had been brought in to see what was going on. One of the consultant's suggestions was that team building needed to occur, because there were clearly issues between staff at the higher levels. This was very true, and I think, had the team building been done differently, we may have actually had a breakthrough.
"Unfortunately, rather than trying to lead team-building herself, the executive director brought in another consultant to do team building. He had us play a lot of games, which were fun, but we never actually 'talked it out' after the games to help deal with the issues that were causing so many problems. And some of the games actually reiterated the super-negative culture that had been developed at this facility, but they were never addressed. I actually left the team-building day saying, 'Things are never going to change here,' which was too bad, because on paper it had been my dream job. The team-building day was actually one of the reasons why I made my decision to leave my position about two months later." -- Laura Williams
Between A Stone And A Hard Place
"Several years ago, when I worked for a professional nonprofit association, there was a lot of discord between several staff members. So to try to resolve the 'hardship' as the executive director called it, she put everyone in a room and pulled out her 'sacred stone.' She asked everyone to hold the stone and to express their difficulties to the stone. Then, she said, the stone would release our hardship.
"Needless to say, a few of us said no, we wouldn't. So we had to go back to work." -- Shannon Cherry, www.BeHeardSolutions.com
"The organizers split us into two groups, discussed the objective (capture the other team's flag without getting hit by a paintball), then gave each player a pair of safety goggles and a loaded paintball gun. Within five seconds, someone's gun misfired, sending a projectile straight to the divisional manager's crotch, who then retired back to the bus for the rest of the afternoon. I personally shot my supervisor in the back -- resulting in a black-and-blue welt the size of a baseball -- and you could hear screams of pain and 'please don't shoot me' throughout the park. The bus ride home was silent." -- Peter Brooks
Have you had a bad team-building experience? Tell us about it in the comments section.
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