Man Walks Into Denny's And Cooks Himself Dinner
There's no such thing as a free lunch, or dinner. James Summers learned that lesson on Tuesday afternoon, police say, when he strolled into a Madison, Wis., Denny's with a briefcase, claimed that he was the new general manager, cooked up his own cheeseburger and fries, and grabbed a soda
Even when police arrived, he stood his ground, and insisted there must have been a paperwork mixup,
reports Channel3000, a south-central Wisconsin news site.
Here's what police say was the sequence of events: The gray-haired 52-year-old (pictured at left) entered the restaurant around 4.30 p.m. in a maroon tie and long black trenchcoat. He went to the office door of the current general manager, insisted that he was a three-decade veteran of the fast food chain, and had been sent from the corporate offices to immediately start his job as general manager.
The current manager told Summers that he must have gotten the wrong restaurant, and the interaction turned into a "nose on nose," in her words. He left and told her that he was going to start work. His first task: cooking himself dinner.
The current manager started called her supervisors, and ignored the knocks on the doors from the bemused kitchen staff. The intruder was chowing down when she told him that he was definitely not who he said was. He continued eating, and said she just hadn't got the memo.
By the time the police arrived, Summers was leaving the scene. He agreed to return, insisted again that he was the general manager, and although the police couldn't confirm the facts, they arrested him. An officer discovered a stun gun in his belt, and when he asked Summers if he had a permit, he replied, "it's in the pipeline."
Summers now faces charges of fraud hotel or restaurant keeper, possession of electric weapon, disorderly conduct, and possession of drug paraphernalia. As he was taken away from the restaurant by police, Summers allegedly shouted out: "This is why you don't dine and dash kiddies." A good lesson for us all.
Claire Gordon has contributed to Slate's DoubleX, the Huffington Post, and the book Prisons: Current Controversies. While an undergraduate at Yale University and a research fellow at Yale graduate school, she spoke on panels at Yale and Cornell, and reported from Cairo, Tokyo, and Berlin.
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