10 Jobs You Don't Want After College

college graduation jobs to avoidOriginally published on COEDmagazine.com


So, you just graduated with your major - now what? Grad school? Professional school? Joining the work force? In honor of the recession and new grads having a hard time finding jobs that relate to their specific field, here is a list of ten jobs you definitely won't want after college - especially if you majored in the following:


1. Communication Major - Telemarketer

You spent four years of college studying media patterns, types of communications across cultures, and now you're putting those skills to good use by dialing numbers from your local area code and communicating that the person on the other line (usually an elderly person who doesn't understand what's going on) that they need their crawl space inspected. Wait, excuse me ma'am, you don't have a crawl space? While the point of your communications concentration was to teach you how communication ultimately benefits society in all aspects, you have a hard time figuring out the positive communication you're putting out into the world when nearly everyone hangs up on you.


2. Photography Major – Glamour Shots Photographer

After completing your senior portfolio, a compilation of over 50 photographs focused on women's bodies in nature, you are now photographing women in suburban American malls. Replace nature with three pounds of bronzer, finger paint for eyeshadow, and oil as eyeliner. Instead of photographing the hippie women of your senior thesis, you are not photographing everyone and anyone that walks in for the $10 deal of the week. Say cheese, nothing is glamorous about this job.


3. Psychology Major - Psych. Ward Janitor

You spent two years of your major focused on the human brain and the psychological theories of why people do what they do. And now, you get to observe what crazy people do and why they do it up close while you clean the ward's bathrooms, trash cans, and group therapy rooms. What about all those experiments you worked on in college to prove humans feelings toward guilt? Now, every day is a reminder of the guilt you feel for wasting your parent's money in the up and coming psychology major. Oh well, at least you have frequent guests such as Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan.


4. Environmental Studies Major - Lumberjack

You dedicated all your time to promoting peace in the world of environmentalism, but somehow you ended up here... at the top of a tree, pruning the branches off of it. With each fall of the branch, you know exactly what will come next... you will have to cut the very vulnerable tree trunk down. If a tree falls down in the forest does anyone here it fall? You're about to find out. This is your nightmare, but somehow your move to Portland, Oregon didn't go over too well and now you're at the top of the forest taking care of business in ways you thought would never be possible. Oh, and you're wearing plaid. Lots and lots of plaid, and not in a grungy post-Kurt Cobain grunge kinda way.


5. Pre-law Major - Bail Bondsman

So, instead of declaring a specific major, you focused on taking classes pertaining to the law because well, you have always dreamed of being a lawyer. Too bad you didn't do well on the LSAT and picked up a few misdemeanor charges throughout college because now you're watching Dog The Bounty Hunter reruns in hopes that you can learn better bail bondsman business traits. Although you aren't litigating, you feel like you're doing your part with one criminal at a time.


6. Zoology Major - Kennel Cleaner

Instead of going all the way to become a veterinarian, you decided to take a year or two off. Instead of doing research on some kind of animal disease or working at a zoo or aquarium, you decide to work as a kennel cleaner. Yeah, all your studying for the last four years is being flushed down the drain with the dog crap that you are spraying down after you arranged it into a nice pile. Animals are cute and fuzzy and amusing, but do you still feel the same way after picking up their poop day after day?


7. Biology/Pre-Med Major - EMT

Looks like you couldn't pass the MCAT, so you decided to become an EMT. You want to save people! Great! But now you are up at all hours of the night, delivering babies (even though you don't know how to properly) in the back of a moving vehicle, and making frequent trips to dangerous neighborhoods for gun shot wound victims. You have had more bodily fluids on you than a first year intern would out of medical school, yet you don't really have any experience. You may feel accomplished, but the pay check reminds you - you don't have the MD quite yet.


8. Education Major – Babysitter

Instead of having your own classroom this year, you are a babysitter to two toddlers. Sure, they look cute, but they are vicious. You wipe more butts than you probably ever will if you have your own kids. You get covered in food, as if you were the trash can. Every day is spent pretending that you're teaching the kids something, but instead, you're really just teaching them patience before you blow your lid. Even though you won't be making much as a babysitter, at least it's a realistic expectation for when you actually start teaching in the public school system.


9. Political Science Major - Dairy Farmer

So, you spent all your time taking political science classes trying to figure out as much as you could about politics - especially food politics. You're a hardcore vegan, and you have planned to dedicate your life to the cause of protecting animals. Especially dairy cows. If only you took those internships in D.C. instead of interning on a commune every summer, you could be on Capital Hill now working towards animal rights. Instead, you're milking a cow. The very animal you swore you would protect. Moo!


10. Math Major - Cashier

You made it through the hardest math classes possible. Hell - you made an A in all of them. Too bad you can't find a job that cares about your out-of-this-world math skills. Now, you are doing numbers, but letting a dirty, old machine calculate it for you - you work at the local convenience store. Your day consists of "That will be $5!" and "Here's your change, 3 cents! Want your receipt?" Forget graphing the daily sales, it doesn't matter. The more you stand behind the counter and punch numbers into the register, the more you forget anyways.



Next: Is A College Education Worth The Money?



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wayofthespoon

EMT here. **** you.

October 04 2013 at 7:50 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
hella

oh thank for this post
it interst
9. Political Science Major - Dairy Farmer
I am
my site: documentarybbc.net

January 15 2012 at 4:32 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
1 reply to hella's comment
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May 31 2012 at 2:06 AM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
azirishmedic

I became an EMT then Paramedic out of choice, not because I couldn't pass the MCAT. I did not want to be a doctor or an RN. I chose to enter this field because it is exciting and fun and I get to make a difference in someone's life everyday.

How dare this article begin to think that EMT's are not trained in how to properly deliver babies. I can say that we are indeed taught how to deliver babies and as a paramedic we actually are required to deliver some before we are allowed to graduate!

The author of this article should be ashamed and should be forced to write an apology to be printed by the NREMT, explaining that he/she made a mistake and deeply regrets their inexcusable misstep.

Also for shame on AOL for putting this out there in its current form.

September 08 2011 at 11:42 AM Report abuse +1 rate up rate down Reply
fairserendipity

I do not agree one bit with the idea that becoming an EMT or Paramedic after college is a bad career choice. My little sister recently graduated with a bachelor's degree in exercise science, with the full intent of going to medical school. While she was in her undergrad, she trained to become an EMT and worked on the university's rescue. In a few months will be taking classes to become a fully licensed paramedic, a job she will probably hold for several years. Not only does her experience working on the rescue prepare her to deal with real-life emergency situations, but it also gives her literally thousands of hours more real-world medical experience than any of the kids in her graduating class, and far more experience than most first-year medical students will ever have. When she takes the MCATs and applies for medical school in a few years, she will not only be exceptionally well-prepared for medical school, but she will also be prepared for a career as an ER doctor.
Please do not shun the individuals who chose emergency medicine as a career following an undergrad in pre-med. They do have to train and become licensed (nationally and at the state level!) to work on an ambulance, and the experience that they gain on the job can be absolutely invaluable - especially when applying for a master's degree or medical school. Emergency medicine is not a job for pansies or the incompetent, and it may not be glamourous, but a paramedic might save your life one day.

September 03 2011 at 12:48 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
ccccccc222

I WAS AN EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION MAJOR AND WHILE SOMETIMES WE ARE USED A BABY SITTERS, WE ARE NOT BABY SITTERS. I HAVE A DEGREE AS DO MOST OF THE HEAD TEACHERS IN THE CLASSROOM. I HAVE NEVER BEEN "COVERED IN FOOD" IN MY 20+ YEARS IN THE FIELD. AND WE DON'T "PRETEND TO TEACH THE CHILDREN" ANYTHING. WE TEACH THEM TO TIE THEIR SHOES, THEIR ADDRESS, LETTERS AND NUMBERS AND MORE THINGS THAN I CAN PUT IN THIS SMALL SPACE. I'M TIRED OF BEING CALLED A "BABY SITTER" . OR A HIGHLY PAID BABY-SITTER. I'M NEITHER, I AM A TEACHER NOTHING MORE NOTHING LESS. STEP INTO A CLASSROOM OF YOUNG CHILDREN. SPECIFICALLY A HEAD START CLASSROOM. NOT TO MENTION THEY HAVE WAYS OF FINDING OUT WHAT THE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED. EVERYDAY THE TEACHERS HAVE TO PUT NOTES IN THE COMPUTER. NOTES THEY HAVE WRITTEN ON THE CHILDREN. EVEN THOUGH NANNY IS NOT IN THE CLASSROOM. HE/SHE HAS TO HAVE SPECIAL TRAINING TOO, JUST LIKE A TEACHER. THAT MAKES HER A TEACHER, ALSO. SO DON'T CALL THEM BABY-SITTERS EITHER. YOU TRY TO DO WHAT I DO. TEACHERS DON'T GET PAID MUCH BUT THEY SPEND PLENTY ON THEIR STUDENTS. BTW IF YOU THINK 2 IS A HANDFUL TRY HANDLING 18 YOUNG CHILDREN FOR 8 HOURS A DAY FIVE DAYS A WEEK. MAYBE I GOT A LITTLE OFF SUBJECT BUT DON'T CALL SOMEONE A BABY-SITTER JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE TAKING CARE OF CHILDREN IN THEIR HOME. AS I SAID NANNIES, WHO REQUIRE SPECIAL TRAINING DO THAT, TOO. AND SOME OF THEM HAVE A DEGREE IN EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION, TOO.

August 31 2011 at 11:14 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
Deborah

I think the author of this article needs to re-evaluate where he stands in this world of hard to find jobs. I am an EMT by choice, not because I couldn't pass a test. All EMT's have to take classes and practical exams just like anything else in the healthcare field. We also have to meet national standards as well. We are well schooled in "birthing babies" as well as life saving techniques such as controlling bleeding, allergic reactions, overdoses, and the well known " my toe hurts". We are up all hours of the night because we love the job and it is our choice. For most of us, it runs in our blood. We are passionate about what we do, we love it and will stand by it. We don't do it for money or benefits and Lord knows we are rarely thanked for it, but when we go home at night and lay down to go to sleep, we have the ability of knowing that we are doing what we love and not just slaving away at a J.O.B. For someone that doesn't know anything about the training that an EMT goes through, he has done a lot of knocking about a profession that may save his life one day. Given the number of professions that he knocked on this page, it seems that he did no research at all and he was just blubbering about all the things that he is unable to do himself. He knocked it before he tried it and now he seems to be the very ignorant person here.

August 31 2011 at 9:33 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
murph

The person who wrote these needs an editor.
The last word on #10 is incorrect: "...the more you forget anyways."
The word is anyway, dear.

August 31 2011 at 6:25 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
maureenreynolds

My husband has worked for the Animal Welfare Association in Voorhees, NJ as a Kennel Attendant for almost 7 years. He has paid holidays, 20 paid days off every year, a good healthcare plan is available, has a decent paycheck. If your dog ever got lost, you would hope someone like my husband was taking care of him. He has no college degree - but he does have a stable job and he makes a difference every single day to lots of scared dogs who just want to go home.

August 31 2011 at 5:05 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
wwhit54690

writer learn the difference between the words here and hear

August 31 2011 at 3:30 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply
ralphems

Just so you know EMT's are educated in the act of childbirth although births in the field are rare nationally. Also you make it sound that we are always covered head to toe in body fluids, and always going into dangerous areas, the latter my prove true in some areas (major cities with high crime reates) but most of the time it's no so in other area's. May I suggest you do better research before you slam a profession

August 31 2011 at 1:31 PM Report abuse rate up rate down Reply

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