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We all do it: release an extra snicker at a joke, give a casual compliment or have the inclination to agree. We all like to hand the boss a little extra attention, secretly hoping it makes us look better in her eyes. But there are those who do it well and come off as polished and respectful, and those who are just hopelessly obvious yes-men.
Here are some tips on being a stealthy suck-up:
What NOT To Do
- 007s need not apply. Don't be a spy for your boss. There's no need to report everything that goes on in the department, warns Liz Ryan, a former corporate Fortune 500 vice president with more than 20 years of human resources expertise. You "gain your boss's trust and confidence by being mature and professional, not by being the office snitch."
- "Have you lost weight?" Don't incessantly compliment your boss. "When she's truly distinguished herself," Ryan stresses, "go ahead and tell her." But daily proclamations like, "You look great," or "Your presentation was incredible," only make you appear artificial and brand you a parasite.
- Heel! Do you track your boss so persistently your bloodhound would be proud? Don't follow your boss around like a puppy. Being dogged relentlessly by "Mr. Johnny-on-the-spot" can become quite annoying.
- Where'd the cheering section come from? Your boss doesn't need her own laugh track. Don't give a hearty guffaw at every lighthearted little comment she utters. It makes you look phony.
- "I agree completely." Don't agree with everything your boss says. "Your boss will appreciate your willingness to speak up, even to disagree with her, more than your blind loyalty to her," Ryan advises.
What You CAN Do
- Time is money. Be on time. That means being punctual when arriving to work or meetings and finishing projects on deadline. Your boss will recognize this and appreciate it much more than an idle compliment.
- All for one ... Be supportive. When in a meeting, reference a comment your boss made or build on one of her ideas. She will welcome having someone else in her corner and most likely will return the favor.
- Everyone needs validation. Notice when your boss has accomplished an impressive feat. When he finally completes that project she's been laboring over for weeks, let her know you recognize the considerable effort she's made. "Be honest and straightforward -- but don't gush," Ryan advises. "Bosses, like everyone else, need reinforcement."
- "Psst ... Pass it on." Avoid becoming embroiled in office gossip. "When someone says, 'Your boss sure made a dumb move,' don't agree or disagree, but say 'Why don't you share your thoughts with her?'" Ryan suggests. Your boss will be grateful you steer clear of the breakroom scuttlebutt that can distract you from doing your job well.
- "Let me give it to you straight." Be an adviser to your boss. "Give your honest opinion," Ryan says. Even if it's not what he wants to hear, you can deliver your viewpoint gently. "This will endear you to your boss more than any amount of sucking up could do."
Next: Worst Boss Stories -- Ever! >>
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Sep 29th 2009 @ 12:38PM Shawninca
There's no need to 'suck up' to anyone. If your being a good, dependable employee and a kind, honest and respectful person period is not enough, that company is somewhere you don't need to be, anyway.
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Oct 2nd 2009 @ 6:32PM wild irish rose
I agree. I think competent employees don't have to worry about how to "suck up" in a covert way. Sucking up hinders more than it helps.
Sep 29th 2009 @ 4:46PM Rae
TOTALLY RIDICULOUS ARTICLE. SERIOUSLY..IT'S NOT NECESSARY TO SUCK UP IF YOU DO YOUR JOB AND DO IT WELL!!! SUCK UPS ARE TOTAL LOSERS THAT CAN'T DO THEIR JOB AND NEED ANOTHER WAY TO KEEP THEIR JOB. RIDICULOUS ARTICLE.
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Sep 29th 2009 @ 10:38PM Andrea
I wouldn't be too quick too judge. In this economy everyone's job is precarious at best- so if it came down to you and another person in the same position,, both doing a good job.. Who do you think the Boss will choose? When it comes time to down size? Get over yourselves and realize none of us are above fostering good relationships,,,this article just points out some ways to do it.
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Oct 1st 2009 @ 10:25AM Jenbug122
I think that is the point of this article - not how to suck up but more how NOT TO BE TAGGED a suck up...while still standing out to your employer. It's just like getting grades in school. You do the assignment exactly how the teacher told you, you get an A. If you go above and beyond what the teacher gave you, you get an A+ and are given special privelages (I had one teacher that said I could skip the next assignment because I had already demonstrated the concepts very clearly!) So, not too suck up, but not to be labeled a suck up - good article, bad title!
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Oct 2nd 2009 @ 7:59PM DMatthiasCoyle
I am entertained by the transparent attempt at political correctness by the writer of this article. Good to know that my boss, Joel, is a female! I think I'll compliment him on his color coordination skills!
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Oct 5th 2009 @ 3:07PM IAMTHEBOSS
BULLSHIT ARTICLE, IF YOUR GOOD AT YOUR JOB, DO YOUR JOB,SUCKING UP IS FOR INSECURE LITTLE LOSERS
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Oct 6th 2009 @ 11:12PM David Evans
This is total bullshit; I kiss no one's ass; if anything, my disrespectful boss can kiss my ass.
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